Christmas Eve Conversation from 2008

me -

I don't feel like celebrating! I don't feel like singing songs and hearing stories of redemption. What about my redemption? What about redemption for my family? What about redemption for my marriage?

 

 

bigG-

I told you... I am working on it.

 

 

me-

But I am so tired. I am worn out. I can not do it any longer. Why can't redemption come now? I did everything you asked. Except.. well, that, that, that.. I am working on, I am planning on it.

 

bigG-

Why not now?

 

 

me-

too hard, too much all at once. And I am so hurt, and he...

 

bigG-

I am not asking you to trust him, I am asking you to trust me.

 

 

me-

I know. But you expect... everything... it is so hard.

 

 

bigG-

It is so hard? And this is easy?

 

 

me-

No this is TOO hard. I can not stand it.

 

 

bigG-

So why not now?

 

 

me-

OK... tell me the story again. The one about redemption. I am listening.