Thoughts on light & dark, Psalms 149 & how we really can not get it wrong
As I worked on these Psalms 149 illustrations over the last week or so I found them covering my heart. Working on the concept of light and darkness, the illustrations took on meaning for my internal work. And as I went through a week of soulful, heavy internal work (which over the past several years have been a nonstop process of excavation) I was comforted.
We really can not get it wrong, can we?
If we get it 'wrong' by hiding. He/She sees.
If we get it 'wrong' in our attempts to get it 'right'. He/She finds us there too.
If we hide in the deepest darkest places of our hearts. He/She is there.
If we hide in the 'heaven' of 'being good'. He/She uncovers us.
He/She holds us in our shame and tells us we are free.
Shame has no power. He/She nullifies & makes trivial our shame filled voices.
Because either way... if we acted out or we never acted... it is ultimately meeting love square in the center of ourselves where we find true, deep abiding love. A love that seeks us, uncomfortably.
My heart has had such deep hidden places that I kept 'light safe and sealed shut' from everyone, including God.
I have been so 'good' that I was lost in being something that God never asked me to be.
I have followed the 'rules' only to realize that was an attempt to hide too.
I tucked away whole parts of my identity and told them to be quiet & not to come out.
He/She found me every time.
And this process, is life.
We can not get it wrong.